I do not mind my own business.
 
Nope, not at all.
 
Let me explain…
 
I like to know what my neighbors are up to. If I see a contractor’s truck in their driveway you can bet I’m going to ask about it the next time I see them. Why? Because I love real estate, home improvements, and everything HGTV produces. I like to hear about the projects other households have taken on. In the end, what I’m really looking for is a referral, because if they’ve had a great experience, I’d like to be able to add that contractor to my roster of future vendors. A responsive contractor who does quality work is rare these days. There’s no harm in asking, and some good can come from the conversation. My neighbor gets to gush about their project, and how excited they are, and it could lead to more work for that local contractor who’s been struggling with supply chain delays and workforce shortages.
 
Also, while talking to a neighbor at the pool, who I know works in HR for a large restaurant group in the area, I gave them detailed accounts of my last few experiences at their dining establishments, remembering servers’ names, etc. Their face lit up because they personally trained those individuals. Based on my testimonial of having had a great experience in their care, they excitedly told me that they were going to reward those team members with gift cards or bonus pay. My remarks were going to impact someone else in a positive way because I didn’t keep those details to myself. Not only did it make my neighbor’s day, but they get to make their employees feel appreciated, as well.
 
While at Busch Gardens with family recently, my extroverted personality was on full display as I started noticing all the special groups who were also visiting the park. As young adults flooded past us wearing JMU t-shirts, I continued to shout, “Go Dukes!” very exuberantly, much to my daughter’s chagrin. There were a few funny looks, but most (who knew the drill), shouted back my way with a greeting of shared school spirit. These exchanges caused my daughter to cower behind my cousins who had no idea what was going on. Other instances included watching Girl Scout troops pass by with custom shirts that I really admired. I would then make eye contact with the troop leader and say, “Yay, Girl Scouts…love those shirts!” Why do I do this, you ask? Why do I bother these passersby with my unsolicited greetings? I use it as practice for being in front of larger audiences. The rejection or side-eye I may receive from these interactions helps to build up my resiliency. I don’t know these people; therefore, their rejection isn’t as harmful as it would feel coming from a small group of executives, or an auditorium filled with industry colleagues. I gain confidence every time I speak to strangers. I can change up my approach, modify my opening line, and adjust my pitch as the day goes along. It’s similar to A/B testing a subject line for an e-blast, but in live in-person interactions.
 
Recently, a call for nominations was announced seeking the names of influential members of an organization that I’m a part of. Nominations could come from any active member, but in the leadership role that I held at the time, I took it upon myself to make sure our organization nominated members who deserved to be recognized. I put together a list of nominees and shared it with our executive board, added their suggested names to the list, and wrote up descriptions of important contributions for each person. I submitted those nominations and crossed my fingers, simply hoping that something would resonate with the selection committee. Something definitely drew their attention because five of our nominees were selected and have now been recognized on all three of the global Top 50 lists that were published. It has not only brightened their days, but also elevated our chapter’s profile within a global audience, generated positive feedback amongst members and colleagues, and given the winners something that they can add to their profiles and resumés as social proof that they are indeed professionals with recognized work and dedication to their industry. Had I minded my own business and deleted that initial email, the ripple effect of positivity that was generated may not have ever come to be. It saddens me to think of how many other opportunities like that have slipped by because we were too busy to take the time to recognize our members and volunteers for their hard work.
 
Additional examples of me not minding my business come in the form of seeing something that’s a bit off and taking corrective action:
 
If I see an overworked drive-thru employee let out a long sigh as they hand over my debit card, I’m going to tell them that they’re doing a great job.
 
If I see litter on a playground, along the river, or in a parking lot, and I can safely remove it, I will.
 
If I see a young woman walking alone in a parking lot at night, I’m going to keep an eye on her until she’s in her car and safely on her way.
 
If I see a car swerving on the interstate, I’m going to call it in.

If I see a tired mom in the grocery store line who seriously needs a nap and a shower, I'm going to nod and smile at her.

If I see someone with a little swagger in their step, in a nice dress, wearing cute shoes, or in a pretty hat, I'm going to tell them that they look great. 
 
When I drop my kids’ friends off after a playdate, I'm going to lay eyes on at least one parent before I drive away.
 
If I walk into a restaurant, venue, or retail store and there’s a table, chair, or clothing rack that’s too close to the only exit I’m most likely going to move that obstruction out of the way. I’m also going to respectfully speak with the manager about why that was important to do with grace and sincerity in my tone.
 
If I see a kid running around a pool, I’m going to ask them to walk.
 
If I see teenagers diving into the ocean near a sandbar, I’m going to talk with the lifeguard or directly with the kids about why that’s a deadly idea.
 
If I see something, I'm going to say something because I actually give a damn!

I care about public safety, I care about how I make people feel, I care about putting joy into the world, I care about recognizing great service, I care about giving referrals and connecting businesses to services that they need, and I care about a lot of things that other people don't seem to care about, or maybe they simply don't see the world as I do.
 
My hope is that one day I will be in the right place at the right time when my neighbor’s kid falls off their bike and needs a reassuring hand on their back and a bandage from my first aid kit. My hope is that I know their name, and their parent’s names, and that they will feel comforted and patched up and back to riding in no time. Can we get back to doing more of this?
 
My extraverted energy may be too much for some, I know it is for my daughter who thinks I’m very cringy, but I’m okay with not being everyone’s cup of tea. My people are out there...in the drive-thru line at Chick-fil-A, admiring my JMU license plates and yelling to their teammate to tell me, "Go Dukes!"
 
I’m comfortable in my own skin – being my authentic self, serving those who I deem worthy of my time, and hanging out with people who don’t mind me getting all up in their business.

​A friend shared the article below, and it really resonated with me. I wrote a blog about this very thing a while back, and reading these words conjured up a lot of hurtful feelings from the past and present. Unfortunately, I still experience this today, and as my daughter ages, I see it happening in her "friend" groups, too. Even in the groups where I used to feel safe and welcomed, I am finding that I'm often kept at arms' length, never quite making it into the inner circle, despite what may be professed by these same people. A life coach that I follow recently reminded me to think about my relationships. Are you giving more than you're receiving? Are you always the resource, but never the recipient of a favor or act of kindness? Ouch. That hit home pretty hard when I truly reflected on it.

I swooped into 2022 with many intentions for my personal and professional life, and I chose one word to guide me through it all..."manifest." It's a wonderful word that has served me well, but maybe that was last year's word, and I didn't even realize it. Now that we're a few weeks into the new year, I'm feeling more compelled to shout the word "RELATIONSHIPS" from the rooftops. I'm grateful for the wonderful relationships that have gotten me through so much these past few years. Relationships from my past working life have come to the fore this past week to propel me forward and rekindle my love of certain aspects of marketing. On the other hand, many of my relationships are waning, and some are simply not worth chasing.

One of the best networking tips I learned as a sales professional was to keep your conversation circle open, not closed. Remain in a semicircle, or horseshoe shape, so that anyone can walk up and immediately fill the gap. It's more welcoming and inviting. I can remember being in packed ballrooms, navigating receptions where cocktail tables were at a premium, but we would squish in and make room for those walking by with their hands full and that wayward look. It's just what you do, but not everyone is taught this. If you're in a position of leadership, mentorship, or in any capacity where you have an influence over children, teenagers, or young professionals, please do the world a favor and impart this wisdom to them. Teach them to be welcoming and kind. It only takes one person to change the course of your day. One kind word. One knowing look of solidarity. Be that person. You might find that one day you are truly in need of feeling seen, and until you see others, you may remain invisible to everyone around you. You get what you give. So, give fully and you just might manifest some new friends.

Check out my older blog posts on this topic below.

Friday marked the one-year anniversary of my breast cancer surgery, and I continue to run into former colleagues and acquaintances who didn’t know that I was diagnosed, and some brush it off because I look “great,” and they want the conversation to move along. For those who have stuck around and asked the deeper questions to see how I’m truly feeling, I appreciate you. Your friendship and check-ins have meant the world to me. I am not always “fine,” and that’s to be expected. Onlookers want their friends with cancer to hurry up and get better so everyone can get on with their lives. Oh, and there’s also a global pandemic threatening our every move, so we have a lot to contend with on the health front these days. I get it. If breast cancer and the pandemic have taught me anything it’s that I needed to stop sweating the small stuff. I also had to slow down to a crawl to build myself back up again.

It’s time for me to share some news with the world. If you’ve peeked at my LinkedIn profile lately, it may seem like I’m out here doing “all the things,” but, I’m multi-passionate, which means that I am not satisfied with doing just one thing or focusing on one linear career path. I zig, and I zag, and that’s perfectly okay. I have picked up valuable skills along my meandering career path. I’ve learned a lot about myself from experiencing the various business models, leadership styles, and team structures I’ve been exposed to. Having to put my career on pause to focus on healing and self-care, really gave me the space I needed to find clarity of purpose. For the first time in my life, I get to be creative every day on my own terms, and that’s a powerful thing!

Whatever I was going to build for myself needed to sustain my existence outside of a corporate environment, so that’s why I’m shouting it from the rooftops on social media! Today, as we celebrate National Entrepreneurship Month, the start of World Communication Week, and Job Action Day (I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried, folks), I am officially launching my consultancy, Linné Diiorio Communications, LLC. LDC exists to help businesses find their brand voice. Whether that be through voice over services, marketing consulting, or speaking/facilitation, I bring it all to the table and customize services for each unique client. You can read more about these service offerings on my website at www.LinneDiiorio.com. For a better understanding of what a voice over artist does, check out my commercial demo on the homepage. You’ll recognize some clips that were borrowed from current media, but I wrote all the other scripts. I now have a sound booth in my home, and it’s been fun to lean on my degree in multimedia to build something that fosters my creativity and benefits my clients.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. Hang in there with me…there’s more. To truly bolster my ability to keep open communication at the heart of everything I do, I am now a certified Prepare/Enrich marriage mentor & facilitator. You read that correctly, I’m a marriage mentor. I’m passionate about bringing my relationship and life experience to the conversation when working with couples of all ages and stages. For those who are dating or engaged, we can discuss common friction points, remedies for wedding planning stress, and practice communication skills based on each partner’s personality type. There are just some topics every couple should discuss before they walk down the aisle! Established couples benefit from our enrichment program where they can tackle bigger issues in a non-judgmental environment. Every couple will participate in an assessment that helps to draw out points of discussion. I don’t take sides. The goal is to strengthen relationships, ease tension, increase empathy, and rekindle the spark that brought the couple together in the first place. Love = Love. All couples are welcome. Referrals are greatly appreciated!

​So, that’s what I’ve been planning and building for the better part of 2021. I haven’t done it alone, as my trusty “Captain” has been by my side for this entire journey. He’s supported my decision to step back from my career to rest and heal, picked up ALL the slack when it came to parenting or running the household, bought me cool audio gear, and given me the space I needed to process everything I’ve been through. He’s my rock, my favorite co-worker, and I can’t imagine doing life without him. Getting my kids on and off the bus was a lofty daydream in the not-so-distant past. It’s such a blessing to be around for my kids now, as I missed so much by working all those long hours in my pre-pandemic career.

I get my energy from being around people and staying involved. I love having a microphone in my hand, so as we ease back into in-person events, I cannot wait to support my favorite women’s conference, RebelleCon. This week I’ll be stage managing, attending to the guest speakers, and providing “voice of God” announcements on the main event day. You know, “Ladies and gentlemen…please welcome to the stage…” I couldn’t be more excited about it. The founder and members of Rebelle have been a pivotal force behind me starting up something on my own. They say, “You can’t be it, if you don’t see it,” and they couldn’t be more on point. I had to immerse myself in new circles, expand my bubble, and elevate my networking environment to engage with, and learn from, women who were out there doing it, and doing it well.
Sure, I’ve faced some challenges. Freedom and flexibility come with many sacrifices, but in the end, it’s worth fighting for. This new venture is a work in progress, as all small businesses are. No amount of naysaying can get me down from the high I experience when I’ve had a productive meeting with a potential client, or someone compliments my demo and wants to use my voice to promote their brand, or I’ve sparked a solution to a problem a client has been facing. In my new role as a marriage mentor & facilitator, I could be saving families. I cannot wait to dive deeper and show the world what this “multi-passionate” woman can do!

​Follow me for more extremely long blog posts! Now, please get out there and celebrate Extra Mile Day by doing your best work and making someone smile. Peace and love, Linné

​Early in my sales career I was fascinated to learn that there is literally an association for every collection of people you can think of. From hobbyists to industry specific groups to labor unions and sports authorities. These groups and their meeting activities were the life blood of the hospitality industry (pre-COVID times) and I truly enjoyed getting to know the people who belong to and run these organizations.

As I progressed in my career I had the privilege to join a few of these groups and have made lifelong friends along the way. I could provide a page full of logos to represent each one, but those that stand out the most are the ones where I have been the most active. I have served as President, and in many other leadership roles, for Meeting Professionals International’s Virginia Chapter; chaired committees for the Virginia Society of Association Executives; lead my daughter’s troop for the Girl Scouts of the Commonwealth; and am an ambassador for Rebelle. Most who know me in Richmond, or have worked with me, met me through these affiliations. I joined these organizations because I wanted to be a part of something positive, career-shaping and leadership driven.

What is most unexpected are the private clubs you discover along life’s path. These are the clubs that you don’t join on your own, you earn membership through shared pain, trauma or diagnosis. Sometimes you may find that you’ve gained access to more than one of these groups, having never joined of your own free will.

Today I involuntarily count myself a member of three private clubs. Mothers who have spontaneously miscarried a child (twice), the melanoma club, and I’m a soon-to-be breast cancer survivor. That’s right. Breast cancer. Thanks, 2020. If you’ve asked yourself, “What else could possibly go wrong this year?” Don’t. The universe will answer that question in ways that you may not be ready for.

Fortunately, having been a marketer in a healthcare setting long enough to celebrate October as the ultimate awareness month, I know the value of breast self-exams and caught my mass early. It’s not small, but it’s stage 1 and we’re going in after it in a few weeks. Then attacking the area with radiation, then endocrine therapy, and then I can hopefully step down from this active membership of having cancer in my body to survivor status. We've made the decision to not tell our kids, as they are going through enough with virtual/hybrid learning and not seeing their friends, and the list goes on...so, please do not tell your children if our children are friends. (Update: We did tell the kids and they took the news well.)

I’m borrowing a page from my friend Jeff’s book and will be “blogging it out” to give updates on my journey. I’ll write at integral stages in an effort to answer questions and hopefully provide comfort to anyone else who might be going through something similar. As was the case in joining the miscarriage and melanoma clubs, I look forward to hearing from all of the warriors who have already walked this path. You see, when you lay bare your pain, or trauma, you quickly find that there are private club members all around you. Once you’re a member, you can then choose to be an advocate for the cause.

​A few weeks after my first miscarriage, I was called by a sweet friend who was suffering through the same situation while her husband was out of town. I didn’t sign up to be the poster child for grieving mothers, but I was who she needed in that moment. Someone who understood the depths of her pain and loss. Someone who agreed that it wasn’t fair, it made no sense, and that there should be more answers. Co-workers and acquaintances secretly confided in me, and I realized that I wasn’t alone. It lifted the weight I was carrying just enough so I could breathe, and then I put one foot in front of the other.

I will walk that same walk in a few weeks. Please reach out if you’re a member of a club you never intended to join.

It’s National Mammography Day, so if you’re 40+, or are younger with a family history or other risk factors, you owe it to yourself, and your loved ones, to get checked. Stay tuned for more info to be shared in a few weeks, and I welcome your prayers. Thank you!

​That moment when you realize you’ve been quietly curated out of someone’s life. They stop liking your pictures, engaging and adding feedback to your posts. They don’t seem to notice or respond when you comment on their content. Even when you mail them actual cards for special occasions…crickets. You also noticed that you didn’t receive a holiday card from them this past year. Ouch!

You’ve thought about trimming down your list of social “friends,” too, because maybe that acquaintance of a friend you had drinks with at that one mixer doesn’t need to see your kids or daily feed. It makes sense to tidy up your contacts at least annually. What hurts is when you’re on the receiving end of the tidying...from people you once referred to as “best friend.” It happens, I suppose. Life gets busy. People grow apart. But realizing that you’ve been completely written out of someone’s narrative is a hard pill to swallow.

People make new friends, join new circles, take up new hobbies. But it’s those OG friends who truly see us, know who we are, where we came from and what we’ve been through...because they were there. They saw it and experienced it, too. You know their truth and they know yours. How could that be tossed aside? How could they have so much space for everyone else? It feels like a break up. It cuts deep and doesn’t seem fair.

Maybe your success is hard for them to see while they’re struggling. Maybe it’s easier to unplug from your static so that they can focus on their own growth. Maybe they found a safe circle of supportive people who live around the corner and can show up for them when things get hard. Maybe you’re different people now. Maybe being your friend is too much work. Maybe you’re high maintenance. Maybe they can’t see your struggle through the fog of their own. Maybe it was time.